1. The Meal Prepper
We get it. You are so healthy, you love weighing your food and you cook tons of flavorless substances on Sundays. As impressive as your brightly colored Tupperware, ability to plan your breakfast lunch and dinner for an entire week might be, and I'm sure by showing everyone you might reassure yourself that eating out of reheated plastic seven days a week is the way to go, I can promise you no one cares.
2.The Excessive Hashtagger
Seriously how long did it take you to write that spaceless, 84 character sentence? No one wants to read that bullshit and you won't, I repeat you WILL NEVER end up on the popular page by #hashtagging #every #single #word #that #you #say #you #simple #bitch.
3. The Future Wifey
Just because you can bring water to a boil and are capable of reheating a precooked meal does not make you highly sought after marriage material. I am willing to bet money that any girl who actually uses the term "wifey" on social media doesn't actually have a boyfriend or significant other of any kind. Aside from that, thanks for setting females back about 60 years. Start worrying about bringing in a lucrative income and being able to provide for yourself because no one wants to eat the luke warm canned goods you call a meal.
4. "Look how artistic I am"
Adding eight filters and using the rule of thirds does not mean you can refer to yourself as a "photographer" and the picture of an abandoned dumpster with no caption isn't thought provoking. Cut it out.
5. #FoodPorn
No one cares what you are eating for dinner and I think I can speak for everyone when I say your overpriced, pitifully proportioned meal isn't even a little bit arousing.
6. The Pity Seeker
You keep us on our toes guessing which virus you've contracted this week, which strain of Ebola you are suffering from or how debilitating your ingrown toenail is. You are so sick all the time but I guarantee not as sick as we are of hearing about it. Our patience for you is about as low as your immune system.
7. Hotdog Legs
I don't know how this even became a thing but I think we can all agree it should stop.
8. #MCM & #WCW
You're in love, you want to tell the world and you do it every. fucking. week. We get it! Unless you are posting shirtless pictures of Channing Tatum every Monday keep that shit in your photo archives where he/she belongs. Also, you're probably 12...where are your parents?
9. "Seriously...wtf is that?"
What....is it? What's the point? Is this some kind of subliminal message they're sending? Am I too dense to understand this picture's deeper meaning?? No. You're the idiot who decided to post a picture of a pile of sand or close up of your eyebrow. #GoHomeYoureDrunk
10.Uneducated Quoter
I'm pretty sure "quoter" isn't even a word but we're just going to roll with it because the quotes you post aren't even things that were said by the Marilyn Monroe or Drake that you attached the phrase to. Last time I checked I'm pretty sure Gandhi never talked about getting turnt with his friends.
11. The Selfie.
Studies show there is a direct correlation between the amount of selfies someone posts and the amount of people who hate looking at their face.
12. Coffee Connoisseur
Is it really necessary for you to post your java art? Or a video or your Keurig brewing a cup? ESPECIALLY a picture of your Starbucks cup with your name spelled wrong? I just can't with you.
13. "Do you even lift, bro?"
Yeah, I do...maybe...regardless I don't benefit from seeing your mirror selfie of you at the gym "getting swole". We hate you and everyone at the gym is making fun of you, bro.
14. "Look how early I have to wake uuuuuuup"
Do you want props for leaving your bed and being productive?
15. Feet.
Nuff said
Disclaimer: If you are a stranger whose picture was used for this post I apologize but lets be serious...you had it coming.
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